I Won't! Read online

  The too-orange carpet that she’d so disliked proved surprisingly soft and comfortable when he lowered her to it. He leaned over her, pressing her more deeply into it. She arched up to meet him, her mouth moving avidly beneath his.

  Case plunged his hands into her hair, holding her still as he devoured her mouth, again and again. They writhed together, their legs tangling. A wallpaper book shifted beneath them; Case shoved it roughly out of the way.

  “Maddie,” he groaned. “I want you. I want you so badly it’s eating me alive.”

  Maddie couldn’t fight him any longer. Couldn’t fight herself. “I want you, too,” she murmured, reaching for the top button of his shirt. “Now.”

  He stiffened, then crushed her against him. “Thank God,” he muttered, and then kissed her again until the room seemed to spin wildly around her.

  They removed their clothing hastily, heedlessly, leaving the garments in tangled heaps around them. Feverishly, they tumbled into each other’s arms, and Maddie cried out with the pleasure of finally feeling his full length against her. It was even better than she had fantasized, she thought dazedly. All those months of wanting him, dreaming of him—loving him.

  The words made her stiffen, though they’d sounded only inside her head. Case chose that moment to press his open mouth to her breast. She melted in reaction, all her misgivings evaporating in the heat of her response to him.

  He moved against her, and she shifted to cradle him. And then she opened her eyes wide and pressed her hands to his chest. “Case, wait. We can’t.”

  He moaned, and she felt a shudder of protest go through him. “God, Maddie, not now.”

  “I haven’t changed my mind,” she assured him quickly, suspecting she would suffer as greatly as he if they stopped now. But— “I’m not protected,” she said. “Do you have anything?”

  He grimaced. “Yeah,” he admitted.

  “Well?” she prodded impatiently when he hesitated. Relieved that he was more prepared for this than she had been, she was now eager to continue. He had already made her feel so much, given her more than she’d ever thought possible. She was anxious to learn how much more there could be for them.

  Case sighed, his expression rueful. “I’ll get it,” he muttered, and he rolled away from her and reached for his duffel bag.

  Something in his voice made her raise onto one elbow and stare at him. “You’d already thought of it,” she said accusingly. “You weren’t going to do anything about it, were you?”

  “Maddie,” he said, coming back to her. “You know damn well I want to have a family with you. Soon. But if you want to wait to have a baby, we’ll wait.”

  She pressed a hand to her forehead, hardly able to believe she’d done it again. Case had simply assumed that her willingness to make love with him now meant everything was decided between them, that she would make no further resistance to his extensive plans. Oh, the arrogance of this man!

  “Yes,” she said firmly, “I most definitely want to wait to have a baby. Honestly, Case, you—”

  He pushed her gently back down to the carpet, following her smoothly. “Later,” he suggested, his hand sliding between them.

  She caught her breath. “If you think you can seduce me until I...”

  His fingers slipped lower. His lips moved softly, persuasively, against hers. “Yes?” he prompted, when her voice trailed away.

  She moaned and wrapped her arms around his neck. “Later,” she promised gruffly.

  “Much later,” he whispered, and kissed her as he plunged deeply, smoothly inside her.

  Incapable of saying more than his name, Maddie forgot her fears about their future and abandoned herself to the joyous pleasures of the present.

  * * *

  “WHAT DO YOU THINK about this beige carpet, honey? The one called champagne. I like it.”

  “Case,” Maddie said, struggling to rebutton her jeans beneath her hastily donned T-shirt. “Nothing has been decided.”

  Wearing only his jeans, which he hadn’t even bothered to button, he set the carpet sample aside and reached for another. “I know. But that’s my favorite so far.”

  Maddie sighed loudly. “I’m not talking about carpet.”

  “Well, we haven’t even started choosing wallpaper.”

  She threw up her hands in frustration. “This is no time for wisecracks!” she snapped. “I want to talk about what happened here this afternoon.”

  Case glanced from her to the bits of clothing still scattered around them. A large brown splotch on the too-orange carpet marked the spot where they’d knocked over a soda can. Neither had even noticed the spill until much later. Case had shrugged it off, saying he was planning on replacing the carpet, anyway—even though this one certainly had its advantages.

  Maddie had blushed crimson at the unmistakable double entendre. She’d been trying ever since to get him to be serious. And she was having absolutely no luck.

  Case sighed at her expression and pushed away the samples. “All right, Maddie. Say whatever you want to say.”

  She didn’t like the weary indulgence in his tone. She planted her hands on her hips and faced him determinedly. “Just because we—we—”

  “Made love,” he supplied helpfully.

  She swallowed. “Just because we made love—” Oh, heavens, that seemed so solemn. So...so binding. “Just because we had sex,” she said, but that sounded worse. She stumbled on without giving him a chance to voice the disapproval she saw in his expression. “I don’t want you to think I’ve changed my mind about us. Nothing has changed.”

  “You’re wrong, you know,” he said almost conversationally. “A great deal has changed.”

  “I’m trying to say that we are not engaged,” she snapped, nerves fraying.

  He studied her face for a moment, then nodded. “All right. So what do you think about the champagne carpet?”

  Maddie was tempted to scream. “You aren’t even listening to me, are you?”

  “I heard every word you said. We aren’t engaged. But I still need carpet.”

  Suspiciously, she eyed him. He was making this much too easy. And perversely, his ready acceptance irked her. Wasn’t he even going to argue with her? Was he that certain he could change her mind—or had he changed his? And, if so, why? She’d found their lovemaking the most spectacular, the most incredible experience of her entire life—but what if Case hadn’t felt the same way?

  Annoyed at her own anguished contradictions, she decided to follow his lead. She really didn’t want to talk about this now, anyway. Carpet and wallpaper seemed so much safer.

  * * *

  SOMEHOW, she managed to concentrate on decorating decisions for the next couple of hours—but it wasn’t easy. Every time they bent closely together over a page in the wallpaper book, every time their fingers brushed as they sorted through the carpet samples, every time Case followed her into a room and stood close beside her to discuss colors and options, Maddie was assailed by memories of their lovemaking. Of tangled limbs and sweat-sheened skin, of deep, hungry kisses and shudders of pleasure. Each time the memories surfaced, she pushed them determinedly away—but each time it was more difficult to do so.

  She found herself in the master suite late that afternoon. It was an especially beautiful room, with a fireplace, deep crown molding, sliding glass doors leading to the covered porch at the back of the house, an attached sitting room with French doors opening onto a small, railed veranda at the front of the house, a dressing room, two huge walk-in closets, a built-in vanity with three-way mirror, a shower and a spa tub that would easily hold three people, should one have such inclinations. The suite was larger than the entire apartment she’d rented when she’d finished business school.

  She stood in the center of the empty bedroom, picturing an enormous four-poster bed, an antique fainting couch, a fire spreading a golden glow through the room...

  “I think this is my favorite room in the house,” Case said from behind her, and Maddie was alm
ost afraid he’d somehow seen the pictures in her head.

  “It is nice,” she said brusquely, keeping her face averted. “Did you want to stay with the same color scheme in here? The green and burgundy you want everywhere else?”

  “What would you do in here—if this was to be your room?”

  “Lace,” she murmured, already seeing it. “Lots of lace. Softer colors than you’ve used elsewhere. Rose. Cream.”

  Firelight on lace. Glistening bodies stretched on satin. Candles flickering on a nightstand. Maddie almost groaned as her knees went liquid in response to the erotic images.

  “Sounds nice,” Case said, his voice rough, as though he was dealing with disturbing ideas of his own.

  She turned abruptly, only to find him standing closer than she’d realized. So close they were almost touching.

  Case reached out as though to steady her. His hands remained on her shoulders even after it was clear she wouldn’t stumble. “Maddie,” he murmured, his gaze focused on her mouth. “It seems like hours since I’ve kissed you.”

  “It has been hours,” she whispered, already straining toward him.

  “Then it’s no wonder I’m starving for you again.” He kissed her as though he were, indeed, starving, and she the only nourishment he craved. And Maddie kissed him back the same way. Because she simply couldn’t resist him when he came to her like this.

  A long time later, Case lifted his head. His eyes glittered like tempered steel when they locked with hers. “Making love with you was the greatest thing that ever happened to me,” he said, suddenly fierce. “But it wasn’t enough, Maddie. Don’t you know it could never be enough?”

  And he kissed her again, the embrace rough, demanding and yet strangely vulnerable.

  So much had been left unsaid, so many things undecided. And yet Maddie felt something flicker to life deep inside her. It might have been hope. Or it might have been fear. But it felt more like an unnerving and yet exhilarating combination of both.

  10

  THE TOWN OF Mitchell’s Fork always held a big festival on the Monday commemorating Independence Day. The festival began with a parade down Main Street, ending at the county fairgrounds, where rides and games, food and crafts booths and several entertainment stages awaited the crowds that always turned out. Beauty pageants, talent shows, sack races, tug-of-war, softball games, fireworks—the organizers billed the event as offering “something for everyone.”

  Children dashed through the fairgrounds, some followed by parents trying to keep them under control, others simply released for the afternoon with hopeful warnings to stay out of trouble. Two or three uniformed officers patrolled the grounds, occasionally reprimanding the rowdier of the youngsters, leading away the few revelers who’d imbibed too many “holiday spirits,” watching for the few pickpockets and bullies who tried to spoil every gathering of honest citizens. But, on the whole, the event was relaxed and friendly, a chance for the hardworking people of the area to play and mingle for a day.

  Maddie had been attending the festival with her family for as far back as she could remember. This year, there was only one major difference. This year, she knew she would see Case there.

  Mike and Maddie settled Aunt Nettie and Grampa in comfortable lawn chairs in a well-shaded corner of the park, close enough to see the excitement, but away from the chaos of the midway area. The older relatives wouldn’t stay long; Frank had come along in a separate vehicle to see them home when they tired. Mike and Maddie planned to stay longer, for personal reasons. Mike had been dating a widowed schoolteacher, who was supervising the teen talent show this year. And Maddie fully expected to spend at least part of the day with Case.

  “Are you sure I can’t get you anything else, Grampa?” she asked when everyone had been settled. Her grandfather, still frail but mostly recovered from his attack a few weeks earlier, held a paper cup of lemonade in one hand and an ice-cream cone in the other. He wasn’t usually allowed many sweets, but on an occasion like this, diets tended to be forgotten.

  Grampa shook his head. “You run along and find your friends now,” he told her. “Have fun.”

  “Stay off that roller coaster,” Aunt Nettie admonished, looking up from the pineapple sherbet she’d been devouring with delicate greed. “You know I don’t trust those flimsy rides, especially when I know how fast those disreputable-looking carnies threw them together.”

  Maddie grinned. Aunt Nettie had been saying the same words to her every year since she was in elementary school—and Maddie answered exactly as she always had. “I won’t go on the roller coaster, Aunt Nettie.”

  She’d never mentioned that she hated roller coasters and wouldn’t have ridden one if she’d been guaranteed a safe ride by Saint Peter, himself. Aunt Nettie seemed to get such satisfaction from believing that Maddie stayed away from them only out of respectful obedience to her wise and watchful great-aunt.

  “Maddie. There you are, we’ve been looking for you.” Jill rushed up with a beaming smile, followed more slowly by Jackson. Wearing a brightly colored knit shorts outfit, and with her dark hair pulled into a ponytail, Jill looked little older than she had when she and Maddie had attended the festival as giggly teenagers. She seemed just as eager now to plunge into the activities.

  “You go have fun with your friends,” Frank told Maddie, waving a beefy arm toward the activities. “I’ll take good care of the folks.”

  Maddie smiled gratefully at him. “I know you will, Frank. Thank you.”

  His cheeks pinkened a bit at the heartfelt praise. He waved her off in embarrassment.

  Maddie kissed her father’s cheek. “I’m going with Jill and Jackson now.”

  “All right. You stay out of trouble, you hear?”

  Maddie giggled. “I am almost thirty, you know,” she reminded him.

  “Yes, but until that so-called fiancé gets some control over you, it looks like I’m still responsible for you,” Mike teased.

  Maddie punched his arm. “We’ll talk about your archaic sexism—and your weird sense of humor—later,” she warned him. “And it won’t be pretty.”

  Mike made a conspicuous show of gulping.

  “Come on, Maddie, there’s a magician starting a show on the east stage in fifteen minutes. I’ve heard he’s pretty good,” Jill urged.

  “And the Optimists Club has a barbecue booth again this year,” Jackson added, licking his lips in anticipation. “I want a barbecued pork sandwich with extra spicy sauce and coleslaw.”

  Laughing, Maddie allowed herself to be pulled into the midst of the festival. But even as she chatted with her friends, she found herself constantly scanning the crowd for one lean, dark-haired, gray-eyed man.

  * * *

  CASE SPOTTED Maddie soon after he arrived at the fairgrounds. She looked sexy as hell in a navy-and-white sailor-collared pullover and brief navy shorts. He scowled when he noted that she was clinging to Jackson Babbit’s arm.

  He thought he had made it clear to Babbit that Maddie was already taken.

  And then his scowl eased when he saw Jill Parsons hanging on to Babbit’s other arm. The three of them were laughing as comfortably together as a trio of teenage buddies as they watched a determined boy trying to dunk the junior high principal into a tank of water by hitting a target with a softball.

  One guy, two girls. Nothing fair about that, he decided with a smirk. He promptly invited himself to join them.

  A hand fell onto her shoulder, and Maddie somehow knew who it was even before she turned her head. Her pulse leapt in anticipation.

  She glanced up through her lashes. Case smiled down at her, and the expression in his silvery gray eyes made her tremble. She knew exactly what he was thinking, because she was thinking it, too. They were both remembering their dinner date the night before, which had ended on the newly laid champagne carpet in his still-empty den.

  At least they hadn’t spilled any soft drinks that time, Maddie thought ruefully. That had only happened the first time, two weeks ago.
Though she’d told herself she wasn’t going to make love with him again, at least until she’d come to some decision about their future, she’d been unable to resist when he’d turned to take her in his arms. They’d made love on two other occasions—and both times were as spectacular as the first. She was afraid she was growing addicted to Case’s lovemaking—an addiction she didn’t want to overcome.

  “Hi,” Case murmured, his gaze caressing her mouth in lieu of a kiss.

  “Hi,” she said, pushing the syllable past the tightness in her throat. Oh, he looked wonderful today. His dark hair fell in the characteristic tumble on his forehead, making her itch to brush it back, and he wore a close-fitting white knit shirt and his favorite low-slung jeans. He’d gained a few pounds in the weeks since he’d arrived in town, so that he looked healthy and fit again. The limp was almost gone now, though the scars would always remain. It was all Maddie could do not to throw herself on him right there in front of the entire population of Mitchell’s Fork.

  “Earth to Maddie, come in, Maddie,” Jill said, her voice bubbling with amusement.

  Maddie flushed, wondering how long she’d stood there staring at Case. She hastily dropped Jackson’s arm and stepped away from both men, needing a moment to collect herself.

  “Did you just get here, Case?” Jill asked.

  He dragged his gaze away from Maddie’s face to look at her friend. “Yeah. Have I missed anything exciting?”

  “Only the Junior Miss Mitchell’s Fork finals. Alison Derryberry won. Lucy Stickling expected her daughter, Nicole, to win this year and she really showed her butt, as my grandmother would say. Claimed Patty Anne Derryberry bribed the judges to let her daughter win. That’s ridiculous, of course. If the judges could be bribed, Casey Cooper would have won—that’s Major Cooper’s daughter, in case you didn’t figure that out. Danny the delinquent’s sister.”

  Case blinked and Maddie knew he was trying without much success to follow Jill’s tale. Maddie took pity on him. “Never mind,” she said. “That’s all just silly gossip. What would you like to do now that you’re here?”